This week Heath takes The Minor Leagues across the pond to relive the wild and wonderful Sunday that was the last day of the English Premier League. If you're familiar with soccer you may find our analysis most Americanly plebeian and uncouth. If you hate the sport then you've already stopped reading this post. If, however, you find yourself in that place in between those two extremes, come on in and warm yourself by the sounds of Englishmen screaming at the top of their lungs.

As an aside, the audio for this weeks podcast was fussed with so that Garageband could record YouTube audio from within the Mac's sound card. It provides some solid podcasting material. Unfortunately it also provides a nearly unlistenable fuzzy distortion. Give it a shot, and I'm sorry.

I'm flying solo in this week's episode and the results are not pretty. Without someone else to talk to I've decided I will talk directly to you. I would make the joke that it's only my mom listening, but I'm not sure I've shown her how to listen to podcasts, and I can't be positive I'm allowed to even claim just her as a listener. Regardless, I took this opportunity to try to wrap my head around just why I create these projects. I hope it inspires you as much as it continues to inspire me.

Sidenote: The comparison of a golden age of television to the golden age of movies was an easy one for me to make and I want to support it further. Part of the reason the golden age of movies was so golden was not only due to the quality of the films being produced but also the sheer quantity. There was so much movie making occurring that there was as much awful content being packed into the theaters as there were timeless Gones with the Windses and Wizards of Ozezes. So, give us another 80 years of entertainment progress are we going to remember Don Draper or Kim Kardashian? Oh, wow. Don't answer that now. One represents a critically acclaimed artistic achievement while the other represents a filthy national phenomenon. Here's the point, despite our best efforts to ruin the medium, television is currently really good. Let's get out of italics.

Those shows, however, are all on cable. And? I'm not watching them. For one thing they're all a little too dystopian for my tastes. (I am a Star Trek fan, after all.) I'm also restricted by the amount of free time I have and I still feel there is something special and traditional about gathering around a new network show. Finally there is something about creativity that happens within defined constraints that can really blow your mind. Network shows tend to be far more filtered and nitpicked by the executives that program them so it would stand to reason that it is that much more a miracle when one catches fire and stays on the air. That's one understanding I can honestly say I gained from studying television. Every person who works on a project wants to make something that is successful. Why would they want to make something that is terrible? Entertainment productions, however, are made from the opinions of many people (and many things, and many studios, and many advertisers, and many time constraints... and few dollars) trying to make something successful. Voila! Failures.

After the break are my top five current miracles of network television:

5. The Big Bang Theory (CBS) Thursdays 8:00

Lovable. That is how the ensemble cast of The Big Bang Theory is best described. When it is time to settle down for an episode of Big Bang Michelle and I have taken to calling the activity "hanging out with our friends." I identify with Leonard, a man wrestling with how to be into everything nerd culture while still being considered normal by general society. The payoff? Friendship (and sometimes more) with the impossibly attractive next door neighbor Penny. She is also a favorite character of mine, and not just because she is easy to look at. She has learned to love this crew of social misfits for exactly who they are. I would say that it is through her eyes that we see how to go about seeing the heart of a person despite whatever bizarre exterior they may have. Jim Parson's Emmy winning portrayal of Dr. Sheldon Cooper should be celebrated as well, for it walks the fine line between the deft manipulation of the visual gag and the easy one note joke of Cousin Cody bursting through that back door. That's right, we're making Step by Step references here.

I have come to agree with critics who say the laugh track for this show is pervasive. I have decided to treat each overly enthusiastic burst of applause as a reminder of what this show represents: A successful live-to-tape three camera sitcom on modern television. So what if it's now the only thing on TBS? That's a good thing.

4. The Mentalist (CBS) Thursdays 10:00

There are about two and a half crime procedurals on my list, and this comes to as a surprise to me because Criminal Minds, CSI, Law & Order -- they're all out. Barely watchable. To make my list it would seem you have to have a higher standard applied to your crime show: Stories grounded with realistic timelines and technology that then use tight writing to apply a believable twist.

I can no longer stomach a DNA test result by the afternoon, CSI. I tire of master criminal standoffs where law enforcement and the perpetrator have a half hour chat over drawn weapons, Criminal Minds. No, CSI, you can not enlarge that pixellated face and clear it up. No, not the license plate either. And, dammit, Penelope, I don't care how amazing you are at using your super computer, you've officially become obnoxious when you do so! 

Given all that, my choice of The Mentalist may come as a surprise. It is, after all, a procedural where a faux psychic aids a law enforcement agency is solving the crimez(TM). Despite being laughable I think the premise succeeds.

First, there is Simon Baker's charisma dripping performance as Patrick Jayne, or Mental Man as I like to call him. (This in joke starts to make sense if you first, as I did, call the character's ridiculous baby blue car the Mental Mobile). To me the wonder of his character is that he always brooding, but he is always brooding so damn cheerfully. Second, the techniques that the character uses to flush out the bad guys are entirely real. No, not the psychic powers, but the craft of reading a mark to give the the appearance of a supernatural gift. Third, we wouldn't be able to understand that this skill is believable without the talented directors that this show has used through out its run. The people whose job it is to show the subtle changes of facial expression that help us see what The Mentalist sees and keep us following the story. This means that you can't ask the actors to do too much, because then it becomes comedy, but on the other hand you have to get enough to make a small guilty drop of the eyes, well, not so small.

I have had my worries that this show is starting to show it's age, and in some ways it has seemed to be a little clumsy with the full series story arc that came to a huge climax at the end of last season, but I have  found the show to still be charming and enjoyable this season.

3. 30 Rock (NBC) Thursdays 8:00

Speaking of age, here is a show that was once a clear number one for me, but now it sits firmly in the middle of the pack in a sort of lifetime achievement award.

Wait. I want to be clear. This is still one of the best shows on television -- brilliantly constructed, and consistently funny.

What has changed here is my relationship with 30 Rock. This was a show on television about making television that came on the air while I was learning about how people make television. The jokes seemed like little secrets that Tina Fey wanted to share with me, and I wanted to be in that writer's room making those jokes. As the series has progressed away from the antics of the writer's room, so too have I progressed away from ever being in that writer's room.

Now I can't decide if I'm more tired of the hijinks of Tracey Jordan or the antics of Jenna Maroney. Still, as long as Tina Fey is Liz Lemon and Alec Baldwin is Jack Donaghy and the writer's keep putting them in the same room I will look forward to watching this show. Just last week the show spun a wonderful web between Liz and Jack as they spiraled out of control into a genius Batman-inspired parable complete with an over the top rooftop showdown. Faith rewarded.

2. Blue Bloods (CBS) Fridays 10:00

So my inclusion of The Mentalist may have surprised you but my inclusion, and subsequent high-ranking, of Blue Bloods surprises even me. After my recent edict against police dramas before this television season I never expected to be watching this show. It's buried in the television graveyard of Friday night, which probably makes it all the more sad that Michelle and I stumbled upon it.

We don't go out on Friday night, which leaves us to leave CBS running until late in the night so that Blue Bloods can come on and capture us, we're old folks. I did say 'us.' I think the appeal of this show is that it is perfect for the husband and wife dynamic. I get to watch Donnie Wahlberg go bananas on the streets, and she gets to enjoy the family's dirty laundry get aired out at the Sunday dinner table. Plus, everyone agrees on Tom Selleck's mustache. That's just simply American.

The twist to this show that requires our suspension of disbelief is that one family can hold a wide swath of important offices in the NYPD department, coincidentally all deal with the same case each week, and seem to have gained all these positions based on their impeccable honor and character. I mean, Noble Knights of New York City might have also been a good title for this program. While the family members are all up for sainthood the series somehow seems grounded. The trick has been how the writers have handled the crimes and how real the show handlers have kept the setting of New York. The police work and the politics seem impeccably real, a reminder that in our reality you would hope a family like the Reagans could be in charge.

1. Person of Interest (CBS) Thursdays 9:00

This is the year's show. The one that the buzz is making grow and I am only too happy to add to the positive noise. For LOST fans this show will be what Alcatraz is not. Actually, I have some thought that for LOST fans this will be what LOST was not.

Alright, before I get ahead of myself, let me talk about what it is. This is Jason Bourne the television series. Which makes Person of Interest a perfect show for the teenage boy in all of us (Note that said teenage boy can be found in the female psyche as well as the male. Let's not go there). This is also serialized science fiction. We don't recognize it as science fiction because smart phones with super surveillance powers and an all-knowing machine that is watching each and every one of us don't seem all that far fetched anymore.

This is also about the entertaining and unique characters that are operating the future machinery. There is Michael Emerson's portrayal of Mr. Finch, which for most TV viewers was a kind of known quantity, it is indeed like having Benjamin Linus back on television, but now he's a good guy (Maybe). Jim Caviezel plays Mr. Reese, the super agent Bourne-clone, a character who is supposed to be a cold and heartless terminator, but Caviezel fills out the role in a wonderfully bizarre way that makes this super human perfectly imperfect. He takes his time speaking, evidence that he thinks carefully before interacting with other people, but he also mumbles, which acts as a sort of proof that he isn't used to the art of human socialization. Or, alternatively, it also serves to make him seem as though he could be a master of the craft. Just manipulative enough to take down the bad guy but just forgettable enough to make it believable that citizens would forget that this "man in the suit" was even there.

My favorite nuance to Mr. Reese is the way he flubs the many action-movie catch phrases he has been given. It reminds me of Mary Lynn Rajskub's Chloe from 24. At first viewing the delivery makes you think it is just awful acting, and then you come to realize that this is a feature of the character, a reminder that in real life we all stutter when given the perfect moment for a personal slogan. In the end it doesn't matter what Reese says, as long as he does what he, well, does, which are the kinds of scenes that encourage me to leap off the couch with a testosterone filled cheer.

Now, that's just the week-to-week action. Remember we were talking about LOST, and science fiction, before? The show format is a kind of spy-story-of-the-week, but meanwhile the shrapnel and untied ends from each episode has started to build a deeply webbed world, with king pins, double-crossers, and old flames alike. We're getting flashbacks from time to time, too and see glimpses of the choices that brought Mr. Reese and Mr. Finch to where they are now. A week ago the men infiltrated a drug ring with the help of an undercover cop and at the end of the story Reese dropped one of those casual mystery statements that reminded me so much of turning off LOST with my mouth still wide open.

Is it too good to be true? Can there really be good television on network? I'm with Jack on this one, we have to go back.

Image by Getty Images via @daylife

The best way I can understand what happened in the year that just past is by looking at the year ahead. That's an odd sensation. What is that? Oh, my. That's fear. I started down a strenuous, but clear, path when 2010 turned to 2011. As this year begins that path will fade only 5 months from now and I have to take back over for what happens next. Who knew 2011 was such an easy year? Didn't feel like it, but I know better now.

2011 was also, of course, very joyful. If it was a highway I was undoubtedly racing from rest stop to rest stop as fast as I could, Styrofoam coffee cups piling high in the passenger seat. Thank goodness Michelle and I planned a special excursion along the way, like pulling into the parking lot of the surprise day at the amusement park, and got married in October (to each other, even!) Camp Fowler was, in a word, perfect;

The Chapel

even though the skies drizzled and the temperatures drifted to lows somehow colder than it is even today. Check this out, the weather being as affecting as it was, pulled the guests together, and as a wedding community, refused to let it be a factor in our enjoyment of the weekend. I can not think of anything more "camp," I can not think of anything more "us."

And I can't say I didn't enjoy the rest of the road trip either. If I take my 2011 education experience and compartmentalize it; it was downright amazing. In my master classes I made new friends, and not just any new friends, the kind of new friends that one makes at Camp Fowler. The kind of people who remind you that you're not the only person trying to change the planet for the better. Funny people, musical people, people I will miss now that school is over. In my elementary internship I made a difference. I befriended nearly 400 children and tried to learn every one of their names. I changed some of my understandings about children and human development. I was supported and cared for as a member of a team of professional educators, and my decision to become a teacher was resolutely reinforced.

Now I enter 2012, 30 years old, (Did you catch that? I snuck it in behind my wedding), and I'm no closer to feeling that mature. 2011 showed that I can follow a complicated plan, and I can follow it pretty well. 2012 will have to prove that I can make my own plan.

Lavender Bells

I'm not taking the time to guarantee it plays at the moment. I'm actually in the midst of homework and this track came up on iTunes. I had to share it.

In the wake of turning 30 yesterday, getting married only a week ago, and the stunning collapse of the 2011 Red Sox -- Well, posting content to the internet purely for the sake of posting content to the internet seems absurd.

Then I stumbled upon this marvelous link that not everyone has a chance to find in his or her own wanderings of the more secluded alleys of the internet. Since there is no real way I can spend the time to possibly draft an all-inclusive memoir post I realized that this is the next best thing. Sharing something wonderful I've found with folks who will, to varying degrees, care. Here!

Here is a gallery of shots from inside Fenway Park. It's not just any Flickr gallery, however, it's a gallery of photographs collected from Twins 3B Michael Cuddyer. Two ways that this gallery is truly special. First, these are modern digital photographs of America's oldest ballpark taken from a vantage point of the highest access possible. A real treat. And second, Cuddyer obviously enjoys photography as an amateur hobby. I'm trying to put it into words and failing -- but, as a sports fan, I find these photographs insightful to the human element. I will let the pictures finish my thought.

The website has been given another year of life. However, if any friend or family wants my help starting a website, the offer still stands.

The problem is that this year I would be paying that bill with my student loans, and I'm just now realizing it. There was a time when I was buying iMacs and big cars and websites and cameras and all sorts of glorious stuff because I was always going to want it as a TV producer. Turns out that was pretty foolhardy. An elementary teacher doesn't need a vanity blog.

Which is too bad, because of course I'm pretty vain, and I love this thing. I've tinkered with websites since I was a sophomore in high school... this is my ship in a bottle.

But, I think I have to shut down this project on September 12th, 10 days from now.

Unless, unless... unless you'd like to end up in the same situation? Attractive offer, eh?

See, the problem in the first place is that I decided to be all fancy and buy web hosting. Plenty of y'all good folks have fancy internet blogomophones that work just fine because you're letting a blog network host your website. It's what I'll do once this Heathernet shuts down, I'll move it to a blog hosting service and carry on.

But here's the neat things I get now:

• Complete control
• Personal domain name (http://www.theheathernet.com, http://www.heathahnert.com)
• Personal domain name email (heath @ theheathernet . com)
• Geek points

So, would you like one of your own?

I will happily build and host your blog-based website and add it to the already proud Heathernet network (See: http://www.drivesafe-savemoney.com, http://www.jordanwhitestudios.com, http://www.nebulaeapothecary.com).

Hm, it's something I like to do anyways, why not get paid for it? Here's the plan:

• Hosting: $10/yr
• Domain names: $10/yr/per domain requested (if you want both a personal and professional name like me)
• Design: Free or Donation based

Design, FREE? What? Yeah, about that, I'm no longer a professional web designer. CSS, PHP, bla bla bla, warp drive, it's all left me in the dust. I don't have the time to actually "design" anymore. What you're going to get is the same thing I give myself: A WordPress theme that has been slapped on and tinkered with to match your personal taste. See Nebulae Apothecary and my Mom's driving school websites in the above links and you'll get what I mean.

If you have an existing blog, we can probably look into moving it. If you have a more advanced idea about how you'd like to share my website, let's talk. If you're really nice and just want to give me money? Well, maybe. The Heathernet only provides one person a service... that would be me. I can't see anyone paying for it.

But an opportunity to share my website with friends? Bring it on.

Email me if you're interested in having a website.

We know the question well, "How was your summer?"

We know the answer too, "It was alright."

That's the standard answer I've had since I left Camp Fowler in 2008, when my usual words would have been, "It was the best summer, yet, camp is the greatest!"

If I take a moment and breathing Summer 2011 in, however, I must learn to modify my words.

It was a summer that I should not be too quick to dismiss, for it may have been the best I've had since I left camp.

It was quick, of course. In the mornings I helped set wedding plans in stone while I spent the evenings working at Dunkin Donuts. Each weekend was occupied. That's not an exaggeration.

With busyness comes adult growth. I have seen more of my friends this summer than I have in three years. I have reconnected with people and personalities that hold deep importance in making me who I am today. I have visited two great American cities and spent a weekend in the mountains. I have met a new niece-by-friendship who has captured my heart and filled it with hope and happiness. I've played music and I've read books.

I have learned that I am someone who does not go out of my way to enjoy life, I often prefer life to come find and enjoy me. It's selfish, silly, but--when you consider my young adult years were spent at an Adirondack playground where everyone I knew wanted to be--forgivable. With Michelle's help I have become a better person this summer.

I wouldn't spend the summer before our wedding any other way.